Sexual problems of older men and understanding their wives' sexual expectations

[Sexual problems in older men] The biggest obstacle to sexual activity in older men is cultural pressure.

Forcibly promoting the image of the elderly as sacred beings who do not acknowledge sexual activity will suppress the sexual activities of the elderly.

Regardless of age, sexual activity is possible in a broad sense, and there is absolutely no reason to prohibit it.

When both oneself and others acknowledge this, it becomes an effective foundation for promoting the smooth conduct of sexual activities among the elderly.

Misconceptions about the aging of sexual response have also become an obstacle.

Some people mistakenly believe that a slowed sexual response is a pathological phenomenon. Or they treat these issues with a complete lack of understanding, and therefore avoid sexual activity.

Prolonged abstinence from sexual activity can lead to disuse atrophy of the sexual organs, resulting in problems such as sexual anxiety, erectile dysfunction, and a monotonous and disharmonious sex life.

Therefore, older adults should approach sexual issues without any prejudice and trust in scientific affirmations.

And based on the actual situation of sexual function and sexual activity in old age, engage in appropriate and harmonious sexual life.

In short, older adults should not feel pressured about their sex life. If they are willing, they can live well without sex.

[Understanding Your Wife's Sexual Expectations] A woman's sexual arousal and sexual response cycles are influenced not only by the levels and cyclical changes of sex hormones, but also by psychological factors. Sometimes, these psychological factors take a dominant role, which is one of the important differences between humans and animals in sexual matters.

The survey found that couples who frequently sleep in the same bed have a stronger sex drive than couples who live apart or sleep in separate beds intermittently. When the husband frequently travels for work and his return is unpredictable or irregular, the wife's sexual response cycle varies greatly. This response is influenced not only by the cyclical changes in sex hormones but also mainly by the psychological influence of sexual expectations.

In addition, many women’s hypersexuality is caused by sexual hunger due to sexual expectation. When their husbands cannot satisfy their sexual needs, they often experience insomnia, anxiety, irritability, temper tantrums or depression. In severe cases, it can lead to frigidity and affect the relationship between husband and wife.

Therefore, the following points should be noted.

(1) It is best for couples to be close yet distant, and to maintain a proper distance.

It might be helpful to sleep in separate beds intermittently or spend a few days apart occasionally, in order to cultivate and stimulate the wife's sexual expectations.

(2) Husbands should pay attention to the changes in their wives' sexual cycles. When they find that their wives have sexual desires, they should try their best to satisfy them, since it is rare for a wife to take the initiative in sex.

(3) Husbands who frequently work away from home should try to return home on time.

(4) When you find that your wife is angry because of sexual anticipation, do not confront her directly, so as to avoid misunderstandings and affect your relationship.

[Men's confusion after divorce] Many men who are divorced involuntarily feel confused and bewildered about their spouses' separation from them.

Regardless of whether the divorce was initiated by the individual, it is common for divorced individuals to experience feelings of inferiority after the divorce.

For divorced individuals, traditional moral values ​​and public opinion often create a sense of oppression among colleagues, neighbors, and friends.

In the presence of happy and fulfilling couples, divorced individuals often lament their inability to create or maintain a happy marriage.

No matter how outstanding a divorced person may be in other aspects, he is ultimately a failure in marriage.

The more competitive and self-respecting a person is, the more likely they are to develop a strong sense of inferiority. It's just that some people are good at using outward optimism and open-mindedness to cover up their inner loneliness and desolation.

Divorce is often referred to as a messy divorce or a noisy divorce, and indeed, many divorce cases involve fighting and bickering.

Many divorced couples, in an effort to prove their own innocence and the other's despicable behavior, often expose each other's private affairs and attack each other's weaknesses.

Therefore, after a marriage breaks down, the divorced person often becomes a transparent person who has been stripped of all their clothes and has no personal secrets.

When a person's entire privacy and shortcomings are exposed to the public, it is difficult for that person not to feel inferior.

For a considerable period after a divorce, the divorced person may feel depressed and lost, experiencing various obstacles in their mental, psychological, and emotional state.

Some people change their lifestyles as a result, developing bad habits such as smoking and drinking; others suffer physical harm due to emotional distress, which can even lead to a rapid decline in physical condition and trigger various diseases.

Therefore, a responsible man should realize that hasty marriages and divorces not only bring instability to society, anxiety to relatives and friends, and pain to personal life, but also cause great harm to the physical and mental health of both parties involved.

[Psychological issues that remarried men should pay attention to] Some people "break out" of marriage for various reasons, but quickly rush back in. As a result, under the influence of the aforementioned psychological shadows, marriage becomes a "besieged city" again.

Therefore, for a remarried man to regain happiness, he must overcome all sorts of psychological obstacles.

(1) Start from the beginning and don’t be impatient.

Although both were remarried and had sexual experience, every couple's sex life is different, and past sexual experiences may not be suitable for their current spouse.

Remarriage should be treated as a new marriage. You should try to understand and adapt to your partner. You need to explore and experience things like the frequency of sex, positions, and how your partner accepts caresses over time to achieve harmony.

If one assumes that being married means they will naturally be adept at it, this often leads to disharmony in their sex life.

(2) Be bold in communicating.

Those who remarry have had sexual experiences with their former spouses, and will inevitably have new feelings after remarrying.

After sexual intercourse, both parties inevitably want to know how the other feels, but due to the involvement of their past marriage, they often find it difficult to bring it up.

Instead of guessing, it's better to be frank and honest with your partner. Only through communication can you achieve harmony in your sex life.

(3) Eliminate the psychology of comparison.

It's not easy to forget the past, but we must learn to look forward. In particular, we should never compare new people with old ones, especially when friction occurs.

(4) Prepare early.

To prevent psychological barriers from affecting sexual life after remarriage, preparations must be made before remarriage. Frankness before remarriage is an important prerequisite for reducing and avoiding psychological barriers after remarriage.